ending 2008...

a few hours before 2008...

... many have their (annual) new year's resolution. ;) and i still don't have mine.
... some have made plans for this coming year except me.

this only shows that I am not really enthusiastic about the changing of the year except for the fact that I will be using my new planner.

but re-thinking about the situation, I may not be much excited about the approaching year but I am thankful of the year that is about to end. another year passed, another 12 months of learning, loving, living.

for those who have changed my 2008, thank you.

i have learned a lot this year.

my college life has ended.
but kept my friends that I have met along the way.
regained my time for my family.
and spent more time to be merry.
had a new work,
ended another one.
continued to write and meet new friends online.
2008 also gave me more time to write and sleep. :D
i love, loved, and is still in love. <3
i am thankful for the people who composed my 2008, and the years before that.


another year is about to come and I hope to continue the bond that we have started, regain the ones that we lost and simply be happy and contented with the kind of life that we choose to have.


now, I'm ending my 2008 with a bang! ;) i love you guys!


btw, this is the new ME...


;)

ending 2008 with a BANGs. ;)

Merry Christmas!

Love.


Love.


Love.


*spreading love and happiness*


Merry Christmas guys! I love you! :)

Christmas shopping- Online style

This year, I saved a few of my money to buy gifts to some people. :) This made me really happy because of the thought that I am now capable of giving gifts from my own money. yey! :) But there are a lot of things that you should do first before one can actually shop. For a woman, it would be expected that I love to shop. This may be true but I am not fond of too many people in the malls. Thus, I did my shopping earlier and also ensure that I do not go to the malls during rush hours.

With the use of the Internet, I also learned the benefits that I can get so that I can shop faster. this is through the use of online shops. There are many shops in the Internet and you can get a lot of choices. There are many sites that can give you stamps, coins and other memorabilia which you can choose as a unique gift for another individual. The shopwiki.com is another online store that can give you a broad choices for the gifts that you want to buy. One of my favorites are the rare books found in the site because it would be easier for me to find the books that I like without the need of browsing different bookstores.

When it comes to shopping, there are already many ways for a person to do it. The market already has a lot to offer and you can easily get the ones that you like. Personalized materials can also be available so one's needs can be easily met. All that you would have to do is to set your needs and search for it.

Comparing...

I just can't help it.

It's not that I want the other over another.
Its just hard to be contented when you know you can have MORE.

5 years

there's nothing to celebrate.

but i still want to remember this day because this day symbolizes a lot of things for me.

5 years ago, it meant love for me.
4 years ago, regret.
3 years ago, hope.
2 years ago, silence.
1 year ago, inconsistency.

But now, it means more.

Moving on...
Letting go...
Contentment...
Love...
Happiness...
and more importantly, FORGIVENESS.

Now, I wish that you will do the same. Let's be mature this time. Be happy. We both deserve to be.

*there is a reason for the picture. i hope you remember...

for Baguio

I was supposed to go to Baguio this December.

Sadly, due to some reasons, I did not- but I wish I did.

Next month, there are three sets of plans for me to go to that place. I do not intend to go three times I only need one chance.

The original plan is with my buddy. Our little adventure this month was postponed next month and I hope the plan would work out this time. My writer friends are also planning to go there and they would be a great company for this adventure especially because none of us really know how to get there. Lastly, my high school friends also want to go to Baguio. If the two plans fail, I will tag with them. They're not really my clique but we are close enough and besides the three of us would still be a great crowd.

There is something in that place. It is like a magnet that attracts me.

No, I can't say that I left my heart in Baguio because it has been almost 8 years since my last step in that province.

All that I can say is that my heart longs for Baguio.

Or maybe I long for a colder night, to bring back the warmth of my spirit.

loved

In this lifetime, we aim to find the one we will love unconditionally. Situations, actions, and events would not matter to us because the love for this person would mean more than anything else in this world. We care for this person so much and his happiness would be important that hurting him would never cross our minds. I have found this person long ago. I continued to love him and cherish what we have. No matter what he did, he always had a part of my heart. He is my first love.

It would also be nice to find a person who will love you no matter who you are. This is the person who knows you truthfully. There will be no hesitations since he knows your past and understands you. I have met this person and the bond is undeniable. He is my soul mate.

Lastly, we seek for a person who will love us unconditionally. This person will make us laugh, smile, and will never let us cry. I can say that I have found that one man who loves me so much no matter what happens and no matter what I do. He is my true love.

People who find their first love, soul mate and true love in one person is lucky but this is a rare situation. I am not lucky enough to be in that situation but I already have more than enough to feel the sweetness of a first love, the understanding of a soul mate, and the trust of my true love.


:) smile... YOU are LOVED. :)

furious

I am angry, furious even.

I just want to say that you make me furious. You don't have the right to act that way. In fact, I was the one who was helping you. Believe me, I am going to make you fall. How could you even think that you are better than I am. You know nothing about me. You don't know what happened. You are ignorant. You're young but that does not excuse yourself from acting so much like a toddler! Immature that is what you are. No, you don't have any respect for me! How could you! Your time will end and I will make it sure that when it does, you will be in no better position. You will not get anything from me. Not today, not next year, never.

Remember this because this will be the last form of communication you will ever have of me. I so hate your guts.



*rants lang po. may nagpainit lang ng ulo ko. isang babaeng ewan. i just want to spill some thoughts because I don't want it bothering me any longer.

that L word

Here's what I can say about a particular L word.

*I don't say that often but when I do, I definitely mean it.
*If I told you that I feel that for you, then you should also know that I will feel the same way even years after today.
*But the future is uncertain when it comes to the degree of what I feel.
*There will be many times when I won't be able to say it.
*There will be more times when I won't be able to show it.
*But I still do. A little more, or a little less than yesterday. But I do.


If you will have a problem with that, then I can do nothing.
This is me.
This is what I feel.
You can't change ME.

Life is a Gamble

When it comes to gambling, I don't really have anything against it. As long as a person is not using all of his money to bet in offline or Online Casinos then it would be fine with me. Being responsible would always be the key in gambling.

It is ok for others to join in Online Casino or in other games. It is just a game, anyway. But when it comes to gambling about life, I am not sure I'd take the risk. There's too much that can be lost and I would not be ready for anything as such.

Now, you see I take life seriously. But I also want to have fun. However, fun would not be fully enjoyable if there are other things bugging me. And this is why I want to keep every thing straight first.

I do gamble. But I would rather not have the chance to win big so that I would also not lose the things that are important for me.

Just A Reminder

"Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot,
who calls you back when you hang up on him,
who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat,
or will stay awake just to watch you sleep...
wait for the boy who kisses your forehead,
who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats,
who holds your hand in front of his friends,
who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup on.
One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you....
The one who turns to his friends and says, 'that's her'."



*yes, you will only have to be proud of me. Make me feel that love.

---


...part of the fantasy of every betrayed person is that one day, the person who hurt you will come back and answer all your questions and apologize for hurting you...

...but the thing is, they won't. they'll die a liar and will feel good about themselves. that's how selfish they are. they can't give you closure, you have to find it yourself.

...you get angry with them,, then you get over them, bless them in your mind and have peace with yourself. when or if that person comes back you can say hi & goodbye in the same sentence.

-Oprah Winfrey


*Give me a reason to believe, a reason to stay, a reason not to feel bad about reality. Give me a reason for all of this.

shallow

yes, I agree, I am shallow.

But that is how you see me because you are looking at a single part of me. You perceive what you see on the surface and that is the reason why you say that I am shallow. I admit that there are times I tend to act that way. But did you try to ask? Did you even try to dig deeper? Try to ask what is happening? why a certain event is happening?

Did you? Never.

That is why you act like that.

Now, tell me that this is all my fault. Tell me that you are perfect. Tell me that you never had a flaw in your system. If you think that way about me, would you even dare looking at the mirror?

Try. Maybe you will see others in a lighter manner. Maybe you will behave better, and think deeper. This hurts me- so much.

I am now thinking...

If you ask me about what I am thinking about at this moment, then there would be many.

For one, I want to buy a gift for my "manita" but I don't have an idea yet. There can be many things that would interest her but I have a difficult time buying since there are actually a few choices for me here. When i search the internet for possible ideas for a Christmas present there would be lots of new ideas flowing. But the things is, not all of these things are available in Legazpi. Thus, my choices are scrapped one by one.

But I cannot afford not to buy a thing for her. As I was searching the Internet, I came across these sites that have cosmetic surgery travel articles. Through my writing gig, i already came across many things that I never had an idea that it existed. This one is also new for me. Plastic surgery is not new and I know that it is expensive, but for a person to spend more money for a place to stay during the recovery after surgery, then that is another thing. Well, for those who have money, then this would be nice. It is still important to keep yourself stress free so as long as you can afford all the luxury in life, I could let that be.

That site brought me to more sites about beauty and the ways to improve your appearance. For those who are physically challenged, there are more hope. But beauty is more than what you can see. When I hear about people who engage in these surgeries, then it makes me hope that they would be happier with the results. Sometimes, its not about looking good. It's more on feeling better inside. Now that there are Beverly Hills breast augmentation clinics and other hospitals also perform different operations to improve the look of the person, the technology continues to improve. For me, some should concentrate on devising the technology that can cure cancer or at least make the technology for plastic surgery safer.

From the thoughts on Christmas presents, beauty, surgery and more, I feel tired. There are more things to learn and yet people stop doing so. Maybe the feeling of contentment is not always right. There are so much more to think about, and even more to learn.

a post for chivalry

Gone were the days when women fight to have their own right. At this day and age, women know what they want and it is now up to them if they will act on their needs. Some may think that women already reached for their goals.

As I see the situation today, women may now have more rights than what were experienced decades ago. But I miss the part when men act as the knight in shining armor for the women. It's not that I want to play a damsel in distress but it would not hurt if someone would help a lady. It would not hurt my pride if a man would care for me or if a man would give way for an elder.

If chivalry is really dead, may respect live always.